Thank you to everyone who answered!! These suggestions are amazing! I really appreciate it. It's also wonderful to know that this disease really can hit as hard and fast as mine has. I was beginning to think I was crazy!!
@A myRAteam Member - I've always wanted to read that book and just never got around to it! I guess I will now!! I love mindfulness meditation and I always seem to find excuses for not doing it. Time to get back to it!!

@A myRAteam Member - You really said it! I've been thinking the same thing, that nothing could really beat the psychological mess of my 20s and 30s, but this is really breaking the record!!

@A myRAteam Member - I love how you have chosen to live life! That is precisely the kind of life that appeals to me, the kind where you enjoy every moment that you can. I get so caught up in all those other things, the mundane stuff that I'd rather not have to deal with, and then I forget to stop and enjoy the sun setting....and later wonder why I'm so irritable and unhappy. It's time I stop waiting until "someday" to fill my day to day with joy.

Mentioned Users

A myRAtea...

A myRAtea...

I'm so sorry you're going through this as well. I feel you, it feels as if your life changed over night. One week I was training for a half marathon and the next I couldn't get out of bed. I was angry. So angry. How was I going to take care of my babies (4 & 2) at the time, let alone myself?! It has been three years and it has been a hard three years. My best advice is to take it one day at a time. Scale back on school. Make time for you to rest which is very important. I took a ton of baths in the first 6 months to help relieve the pain. Massage helps as well. I went to a therapist. It's a roller coaster ride even with that. You can have a great few days and start making plans, then BAM, a flare. It does make you feel hopeless. But you will get through it and things will find a way of working out. We learn to deal and it's a process, sometimes a longer one than we want or expect. I still have moments I feel totally hopeless and I have a good cry and submerge myself in self care, then come out of the fog in a better state of mind. My husband has become tremendously supportive but even that was a process on its own. I recommend talking to someone about it and find a place/person who is non judgemental, who will just listen to you vent and HEAR you. Sometimes we just need to do that. Best of luck to you.

Unfortunately for all of us, unpredictability is the hallmark of RA and many other autoimmune disease like it. I feel like the uncertainty we live with, and our inability to make basic plans for our future is an extremely close runner up to the pain we experience in terms of how disabling this disease is. So few people understand or empathize with how maddening it is to never know what tomorrow will bring in the really concrete way that we do.

I have a couple of ideas for you based on my experience. I hope some of it can be helpful, but if it's not, that's okay too. Just know that I am rooting for you!

School: Have you met with anyone from the disabled student services center from your college? They can be fantastic advocates to have on your side, and extremely helpful in securing accommodations that you are ENTITLED to. Extra time on tests, and sometimes even on assignments can be a God send when you are in the middle of a flare. They also can connect you with all kinds of services that I have found very helpful. I will admit that I had a difficult time self-identifying as a "disabled student," but you know what? We are. There is no reason we shouldn't benefit from the help that our tuition (and sometimes, tax money) pays for.

Coping Strategies: I have found Mindfulness based stress reduction techniques ("MBSR") to be extremely, extremely helpful. Most of these are based on mindfulness meditation. It's not a miracle cure, but even as a skeptic I have found that when I focus on very actively managing the anxiety and stress I feel because of the pain and inconvenience of rheumatoid disease, my pain level comes down, I don't have quite as many side effects from my meds, I don't experience as much depression, I am able to have more patience (with myself and others), and I just generally feel more like myself. I took my MBSR and meditation classes four years ago, and since that time they have really caught on, Many hospitals and health centers offer seminars now, and there is a ton of information available on the web. The person credited with "inventing" the discipline is Dr. Jon Kabat-Zin. His book, Full Catastrophe Living, is considered the foundational text on the subject. It's really readable, not full of jargon. I highly recommend it. He also runs a research clinic at The University of Massachusetts Medical Center that focuses on MBSR techniques specifically for people with chronic and/or debilitating illness. They have a lot of great information on their website, heres the link: http://www.umassmed.edu/cfm/

I hope some of this can help lead you down the path to peace of mind. I've been where you are. I probably will be again someday. I'm sending you lots and lots of strength. :-)

Good for you! You HAVE to be your own advocate and practice pacing yourself so you can meet your obligations and sometimes doing something fun or just for you! I have found that when I take the bull by the horns so to speak, my mental and emotional outlook improves and so does my stamina! Good luck with your meetings and enjoy your Spring Break! Please keep me posted on the outcomes of your meetings! Gentle hugz!

The most difficult part I found with this disease is the mental aspect of it all. In my mind I am only 47 and capable of doing many things. Atheletic raising two beautiful daughters working full time sometimes 2 jobs etc. Then BAM! Your diagnosed with RA disease. The pain the uncertainty of what tomorrow will bring let alone today? Last week out of know where I was so beside myself and started to cry uncontrollably. Every joint was in pain all I wanted to do is sleep. Extreme fatigue the kind where you want and know you have to get out of bed because you have so much to do but physically can't. Then your mind starts going with why me? Anxious about what family, friends and co workers think? Your lazy things you use to do have become physically draining. My mind needs to catch up with the physical aspect of this disease. So I take one day at a time rest when I am physically exhausted that's my body telling my mind slow down you can't do all! Take lots of baths with scented bath salts and candles, as hot as I can stand the water. I stretch my joints as much as I can I just do what makes them feel good. Eat as healthy as I can. I love this site it helps to listen yo others that I can relate too as well offer advice, if it helps others then I have done some good. Also I contacted my Arthititis Association and talk to councilor's there. It's nice just tohave someone listen to me who doesn't judge but offers support and understanding. I have an appointment tomorrow with my regular Dr. Who is compketing a FAF FORM (Functions Ability Form) which lets my employer kjow what I can and can't physically do. So I hope this helps just live in the moment one step at a time.