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Family Support

A myRAteam Member asked a question 💭
Naahville, IL

I was just diagnosed two days ago although I have been having the issues for over a year now I took me 8 months to get in to see a rheumatologist for him to run tons of tests and then tell me nothing. I knew something was wrong it isn’t normal for someone to hurt like this. I got to the point 3 months ago that I can’t walk in the mornings and evenings cuz the pain is so horrible and I can’t for the life of me get my husband to understand that I need help with things and I can keep up like I used… read more

December 14, 2018
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Answer Summary

Members rallied around someone newly diagnosed with RA whose husband doesn't understand her pain or need for help, with many sharing their own... Read more

Members rallied around someone newly diagnosed with RA whose husband doesn't understand her pain or need for help, with many sharing their own experiences of partners and family members who struggle to grasp the invisible nature of chronic illness. Several members emphasized the importance of patient education through articles, reading research aloud, and having direct conversations about how RA truly affects daily life, while others acknowledged that some loved ones may never fully understand unless they experience it themselves. A recurring theme was finding support outside the home through communities like this site, prioritizing self-care without guilt, and taking the disease one day at a time while remembering that everyone's journey with RA is different.

A myRAteam Member

CrypoChick710:
Are you holding off from taking the Methotrexate because you're nervous about taking it? If so, maybe you could ask your doctor about hydroxychloroquine. (It's generic for something). I was diagnosed in October and my Dr started me on it. It's been around for 40 years and seems a lot safer. Anyway, it has really, really helped me with the pain, fatigue and stiffness.

December 15, 2018
A myRAteam Member

I'm so sorry you're going through a rough time. I was there at one point. I know the pain your going through. It was bad that i wanted to take a bottle of pills to end the pain. Nobody deserves to live like that. But i learned to live day by day. If i had the the strength to clean the house or wash the dishes, i would do it. If not the hell with the house. I took care of me. So you need to care for yourself. Even if you sleep all day. You come first. Who cares what other people say. Soft hugs. Keep your head up girlfriend. 😊

December 15, 2018
A myRAteam Member

Have you heard of Low Dose Naltrexone? - https://www.ldnresearchtrust.org/what-is-ldn. I'm waiting to be prescribed it privately in the new year I wish I could get it sooner.
I have been prescribed MTX but I'm not taking it until I've tried LDN

December 19, 2018
A myRAteam Member

As a man, your story really upsets me and I was in the army. Forgive me, I know I don't know either of you, but your husband needs to man up and stop being a bully. I always help and support my wife. I did through her pregnancies and her shoulder replacement.... I'm sure I've failed somewhere, too.

Now that my rant is over, it's taken a while for my wife to understand my pain and struggles. I finally had to sit her down and explain what this disease really is. I told her I will need her help at times. At the end of the day, we agreed we need to communicate.

I use this site to vent, though, so I don't make this disease the focus of our marriage.

As others have said, we're here for each other. Be good to yourself.

December 18, 2018
A myRAteam Member

I am so sorry you are going through this. I have lost a close friend because they did not understand my RA and basically said I use it when its convenient and when I don't want to do something. This site is super helpful and I hope we can give you some support. Quality of life can suck with RA but it can get better. I'm still waiting for that to happen too. Hugs sent your way.

December 15, 2018

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