I explain to those i love one time !! After that i just concentrate on taking care of myself !! It would be wonderful for everyone to understand but they can't . I am learning to concentrate on my health and not what others think of my daily goings on.

Guys the answer to all this is easy......?

After a few shots of whisky you neither feel anything or care if you do ..... !

I hate how hard it is to explain RD, so while in college I used it in every presentation. Being in the Human Service program, I felt that those people if no one else should have an understanding of what an invisible illness can mean to the person suffering from it on every level, so I did. I used everything at my disposal, the Spoon Theory, the ugly word "chemo", the my body fights it's self, what does yours do? Whatever got their attention. My one professor and class helped me set up my future RD support group. People don't know what they aren't told. If only one person gets on a puter and looks up this nasty disease I'm happy.

I saw a quote about explaining RA to someone. "Imagine having the flu. Imagine the day before you fell off your bike going 20 mph. Now imagine you feel that way most days." There was another quote that asked "do you ever wake up feeling great, super energized. Do you ever wake up feeling tired and sore, not wanting to do anything because your body ached? Now imagine the days were switched".

I plug along, slow, but still move. Most people around me, friends, family and co workers know I have RA. They also know I don't complain a lot about it. I do not let RA define me as a person. I do what I can, sometimes I decide to stay home. But most of the time I join in with the plans. I've had RA for 25 years, I manage my disease so it doesn't take over my life. I am luck because my husband understands and is sympathetic and helpful. One thing you have to realize, it's not a competition of who feels worse. Be happy and thankful for each day you have. Yes, I have my down days, but most of the time I stay positive.
Be well.

Just wrote this Blog on Wordpress:

Wearing the Mask of “I’m Fine”

So often now, I’m not sure that my “people” trust me when I say, “I can’t”, “I’m having difficulty” related to the medical issues I am currently experiencing.

When I say I am having difficulty with normal everyday activities, I AM having difficulty with normal, every day activities. I’m not lying. I am being open, vulnerable and as honest as I can be.

Not having a visual reminder such as a cane, or crutches, or a limp, or a sling doesn’t mean it isn’t happening. There are illnesses that have an “invisible” element to them.

Some mental and physical illnesses that don’t scream out “look at me, I’m having a bad day”. Not all illnesses put you in bed for the day, week or month. We don’t want to be in a nursing home. We want to have the same life that someone without a disability enjoys.

And so, we try. We say we are fine. Or we say we are not fine, and hope that people don’t make judgements on our health, by what they see with their physical eyes. Oh, they are walking, and talking. They must be fine, or better.

If you remember, I am the same person who used to be very active. Active working in a full time job; entertaining people in my home; active initiating groups, and events within the community; enjoying two-week holidays on the back of a motorcycle.

I can no longer participate in these activities that I so enjoyed.

I was always the one whom you called brave; overriding my physical conditions of rheumatoid arthritis, and for a time, breast cancer. In spite of the challenges I was able to maintain some sort of normal for myself, that looked like your normal.

It seems that the arthritis has finally caught up with my body; physically and mentally. I am no longer able to be active in the same way that I once was.

Please don’t be offended if I can’t join you; or don’t offer the same hospitality that I used to. Believe me, if I could I would.

I am not sad about my current situation; although in the past it has been difficult, and I had to get to a place of acceptance, in order not to “be sad”.

I am still enjoying my life, just in a different way. I still enjoy love and support.

I am just asking you not to make assumptions based on what you see, about my health, and what I can or cannot do. Let me decide.

PS I don’t want to talk about it all the time. When we start discussing our different medical issues, it makes me feel “old”, and I know that’s not all there is to this life.